Dazzle Them

Another week has flown by. Oh, speaking of weeks, this move will have seven weeks instead of six. I'm not sure why. So today is actually very close to the midpoint of the transfer. It seems impossible for so much time to have passed already (but it simultaneously feels like a long time...How does that work?). I suppose everything has been carrying on as usual, although life never feels anywhere close to monotonous or routine.

Last week on Friday we had Zone Conference in Kaohsiung. It was excellent, as usual. One thing I really liked from that was a statement by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, one of the twelve apostles. It's from "The Gift of Teaching", a segment in a worldwide training broadcast that the church does regularly (though I'd never seen any of it before my mission). He was reminding us once again that the Holy Ghost is the teacher, not us. I don't remember his exact words, but he said something along the lines of: "Don't try to dazzle them with your brilliance. Dazzle them with the brilliance of the gospel." Good for me to remember that if the thing being shared is of infinite worth, nothing could be more persuasive than simply a clear view of the thing itself.

Teaching, Learning, and Translating

Elder Bednar's visit was wonderful, of course. We had three hours with him, which was mostly spent asking and answering questions. I think one of the most memorable things for me was the understanding I gained about teaching with the Spirit, being taught by the Spirit, and letting the Spirit be the teacher. I felt that Elder Bednar taught this most powerfully by his example as he invited us to be active participants in the experience. He made it very clear that he knew he was not the source of our learning. This taught me a lot about how I should approach gospel teaching, but also about how I can open myself to be taught. The process of actively identifying and asking our heart's questions allows us to be sensitive and open to the Spirit's teaching us the things that we need to learn. Sometimes we may actually voice our questions, in discussion settings, but the process works just as well in a meeting like General Conference, or in studying texts like the Book of Mormon, where we can't actually vocalize our questions to the speakers or authors. The reason it can work is that the Spirit already knows everything and everyone involved. When the speaker/author is speaking/writing by the Spirit, and the hearer/reader is trying to hear/read by the Spirit, and actively searching for needed guidance, silent questions can be asked and answered at least as well as if they were spoken aloud. In fact, sometimes questions we didn't even quite realize we had can be answered, because God knows our needs better than we know them ourselves. Anyway, it's a marvelous process, and one that I'll probably be learning to facilitate for the rest of my life.

I had another new and interesting experience this week. This past weekend was district conference for the Ping Dong district. We attended the general (open to everyone) session on Sunday morning. I was asked to translate for a woman from the Phillipines. She's been living in Taiwan for more than 10 years, but she says her Chinese isn't good enough to understand "deep" topics. I'm not sure how much it helped her, but I did my best. I've never translated and listened at the same time. (I think there's some kind of phrase for that, but I don't know what it is). Some speakers were a lot easier than others, because of their speed and the vocabulary they used. My listening comprehension has improved over the course of my time in Taiwan, but it can vary a lot based on who is talking, and what he/she is talking about. It took me back to my summer at the U.N., where I regularly attended meetings and often took advantage of the translation for comments in languages other than English or Spanish. I have a whole new appreciation for the skill set those translators have. Despite the fact that my translation was far from perfect, I felt a lot of blessings and help to be able to listen in Chinese and speak English at the same time, and I was grateful to be of use.

A New Adventure

Here I am, after my first 10 days in beautiful Ping Dong. I do like the south. I mean, our whole mission is basically the south, so I guess I'm referring to the south of the south. It's definitely warmer than Yong Kang, and the temperatures are gradually rising, but it's still quite pleasant outside. Also, the trees are beautiful, the fruit tasty, and the bugs many. (I could do without the last one, but there's probably something good coming of it.)

I think it's always sort of an adventure to move into a new place and get to know everything from scratch. Last weekend we watched General Conference, and this weekend we'll have District Conference. (A district encompasses several wards or branches, but is smaller than a stake, and is presided over by the mission president. Ping Dong City is part of the Ping Dong District, which includes my first area--Chao Zhou--among others). As a result of these out-of-the-ordinary church meetings, getting to know the two branches we cover is a little slower, but we've gotten to meet with a fair number of members. I love members everywhere. From the start of the move, Sister Chen and I were already talking about trying to increase and improve coordination of missionary work with the members. Then Elder Perry, one of the twelve apostles, gave that talk in General Conference in which he brought up "member-oriented proselyting programs", which reinforced some of the ideas we had been mulling over. General Conference is always like that--it always seems to address exactly the things you need right when you need them.

The other night while we were waiting for someone outside the church, two members from Chao Zhou showed up for a single-adult family home evening activity. Sister Stratford and I met them and started teaching them while I was in Chao Zhou, and they got baptized a couple months after I left. We've kept in touch via letters, but I haven't seen them since they were baptized. When they saw me, they both burst into tears and threw their arms around me. I was, of course, thrilled to see them as well. I think there are some very close bonds that form when you share part the testimony-gaining process with someone. These bonds apparently transcend communication barriers, because my Chinese back in those days was probably borderline unintelligible, putting it mildly.

Tomorrow we'll have a special treat: Elder David A. Bednar (one of the twelve apostles) is coming to Taiwan. In the evening he'll do a fireside for members/anyone, but in the afternoon, the missionaries get our very own three hours with him. President Hsu says he'll likely just open the time to our questions, so I've been thinking and praying to see if there's anything I should ask. I've got a couple ideas, but we'll see when the time comes what feels right. Maybe other missionaries will ask the questions I really need the answers to (to which I really need the answers?). Either way, it's going to be a great experience. President Hsu has asked us to come an hour early to the meeting to prepare ourselves spiritually. I know there will be a lot to learn there, from what he says, but also mostly from what the Spirit says, so we've got to get ourselves ready and receptive and attentive. I'm excited!

Ping Dong

Hello all! I've returned back to lovely Ping Dong! I say returned, because Chao Zhou, my first area, is actually in Ping Dong county. My new area is centered in Ping Dong city, which, unsurprisingly, is also in Ping Dong county. I'm here with Sister Chen, who was born in Kaohsiung and then moved to Taipei when she was 10. This is her 5th move as a missionary (I almost wrote "on island," which works for foreign missionaries, but not so well for those who have been "on island" their whole lives). Of course, saying goodbye is always a bit sad, but I feel really good about being here. I'm so glad I got to be in Yongkang for four months of my mission; the people I met and miracles I witnessed there will always be very dear to me, and I feel like I gave my best there. But it's exciting to move, and to know that being in Ping Dong with Sister Chen is exactly what I need to be doing right now.

On Saturday, our investigator Sister Huang got baptized. It was so wonderful to be there. I think it is a special tender mercy for a missionary to get to see an investigator from her first time meeting with missionaries until her baptism. Before people ever meet with the missionaries, they are prepared to receive the gospel, and learning/growth continue long after baptism, but the missionary's primary responsibility comes in for that first step of learning the basic gospel principles and determining to live by them. So to be allowed to witness someone develop and recognize her own testimony to the point of being willing to commit to live it forever is pretty amazing. Conversion really is a change that comes from the inside out. As Sister Huang said when we met with her the day before her baptism, when you have faith in God, you want to obey. If you ever think about disobeying, you can just remember Him, and then you won't want to anymore. The obedient acts spring out of that internal conviction and belief. There are still leaps of faith to be made. For example, the first time we invite someone to pray, she may have never prayed before, and have absolutely no experience to tell her it will do anything at all for her. But if she has hope that the blessings we describe could be real, she'll go try something she's never done before, and create an opportunity for her own spiritual experience. After the trial of faith comes the blessing of an answered prayer, which would never be possible without praying in the first place. Suffice it to say, I think I've learned a lot about the conversion process. I've thought a lot about the scripture (which I may have quoted before) that says, ". . . he meaneth that it shall come by way of the Gentiles, that the Lord may show his power unto the Gentiles. . ." (Book of Mormon, 1 Nephi 15:17). As the Lord works through people, a significant part of His purpose is to show those people, His instruments, His power. I know that as a missionary, I have been an instrument of the Lord, and as the instrument I can tell that the real power or driving force has very little to do with my own abilities.

Inspired Referral

Another exciting week! We had a really miraculous experience with a member referral this week. We try to ask everyone we talk to who they know who would like to meet with us. As you might imagine, most people would be more receptive to an invitation from a friend or family member that a stranger (with poor Chinese) on a bike at a stoplight. Last week, one of the members, Sister Zhao, invited us to call some of her friends to set up a time that we could meet with them. One of them she expected might not be interested--actually, what she said was, "Ta yinggai hui ma wo ba" (She'll probably scold/reprimand me). When I called her friend, after the first few minutes of conversation, I thought Sister Zhao had hit the nail on the head, but then she suddenly said she'd be happy to set up a time. When we met with her, we found out that her father recently became very ill. She's obviously very concerned about him. As we taught her how to pray, and encouraged her to pray for her father, she was geniunely grateful for a way to petition blessings now when her family especially needs them. I was really grateful to be with her to share the thing she needed right when she needed it. Through no design of our own (Sister Zhao had no idea until that lesson that her friend's father was sick), we ended up in the right place at the right time. It's a great feeling.

Move calls are this Friday, and move day is on Monday. I feel like I've really learned a lot this move, and the whole time I've been in Yongkang so far. If I stay here, I'll be excited to still be in this area. If I leave, I'll be excited to meet a whole new group of people and see what I can learn and how I can strengthen the area. When I was thinking about putting in my papers, I realized that I was hoping I could go to Latin America, because I really love Hispanics, and I would love to share the gospel with them. I tried really hard to get rid of that preference before I got my call, and by the time I opened the letter, I really didn't care. Move calls are basically same way; I already know that I love this place and these people, so I might naturally hope to stay, but I'm learning to be excited about the people and places I don't know yet, because if that's where I'm called to go, that's exactly where I need to be. Being where I need to be is much better than being where I want to be. But I think Sister Ma would like to stay here, and it's most common for one companion to move, so I sort of hope I move, so she can stay in Yongkang.

Inspired Leaders

Hello! Summer is creeping in upon us. For anyone who may have scoffed at my chills in the mild Taiwanese winter, I have only this to say in my defense: Yes, it is much colder in Iowa (or Utah, or Ohio) in the winter than it is here, but you don't put on a skirt and bike around in it do you? No. Also, when your home is colder than it is outside and the unreliable water heater sometimes robs you of a hot shower, however mild the chill may be, it can get down to your bones and stay there. But it is a blessing that the winter is not slippery, and in the end, really not that cold. I'm also grateful that it doesn't rain nearly as much in the winter as the summer. There are many aspects of Taiwanese winter for which I am very grateful, but I won't pretend that I never passed a cold day.

This past week we had our interviews with President Hsu. I look forward to this once-a-move opportunity to sit down with him, one-on-one, and talk about anything. He's so in tune with the Spirit and our needs. He always seems to know exactly what to say, even if it takes me a few weeks to figure it out. When I think back on the counsel he's given me since I got on island, I realize how much it has shaped the way I've worked to improve and change. To think that he does that for hundreds of missionaries during his time as mission president is amazing. I'm sure without divine assistance it would be impossible; he simply doesn't have enough time to get to know our needs that deeply on his own. Every interview, he says an opening prayer. He asks for the guidance of the Holy Ghost. And then he'll usually ask me a question, maybe about how my companion is, or to find out what's been on my mind recently. He'll invite me to ask him questions, about the scriptures, doing missionary work, personal concerns, etc. Sometimes it seems that his answer doesn't quite respond to the question I asked, but the miracle is that he tells me exactly what I need to know right then; like answering the question I wanted to ask, but didn't know how. That's one of my strongest witnesses that he is called of God, and that it is God leading the work, not a man.

Dual Equilibria

The week flew by. One of the highlights was definitely our investigator Sister Lin's baptism on Saturday night. She's been wanting to get baptized ever since I met her last month. The preparation process was none too easy; she had to do some really difficult things to get there, but she did it! The member turnout was really good, which is a wonderful way for someone as they become a brand new member of the church to feel the love and support system they're inheriting. Her boss, who is also the stake president, rushed back from a meeting in Kaohsiung to perform the ordinance. She was probably the least nervous of anyone I've seen yet to be completely immersed in water.

After the service, we all gathered in the kitchen for celebratory goodies. She told Sister Ma and me that from the moment the baptism was completed she felt happier than she had in a long time. She was positively glowing. Her husband, who is not a member of the church, attended, along with their two children. At church on Sunday, she was confirmed a member of the church and received the gift of the Holy Ghost. The confirmation is necessary to complete baptism. When we're baptized, we covenant with God that we are willing to take the name of Christ upon us and to obey His commandments. He cleanses all of our past transgressions, and through the gift of the Holy Ghost allows us to have the companionship of the Holy Ghost as long as we're worthy. That blessing helps us uphold our part of the covenant, because the Spirit will protect us and teach us what is true so that we can make good decisions.

To prepare for this covenant, a person needs to develop faith in Christ and change his/her life to be in harmony with God's commandments. That process of repentance is ongoing, continuing far beyond baptism, but it has to be begun before baptism. Seeing Sister Lin so full of light and joy, especially after walking part of that preparatory road with her, provided another witness to me of the power of the gospel to make us happy as we apply it, and also that blessings really do come after the trial of our faith. Also, I think I learned a lot about how painful changes really can be worthwhile when they are for the sake of something true.

Somewhere in the cobwebs of my pre-mission memories I remember an simple economic model in which there are two equilibria. One is more desireable than the other. However, if you're already at the less-desireable one, you have to go through some sort of costly process to get to the more desireable one. During the process, you may temporarily be worse off than you were when you were just sitting on the original equilibrium, but if you stick it out until you get to the more desireable one, the long-term benefits will outweigh the cost of getting there. I think that's sort of like the repentance process. Everything seems to be going along just fine, and then you find out that something you're doing isn't what God wants you to be doing. In the process of changing, you may be more sad or experience frustrations that you didn't have before. But in the end, you arrive at a place that is happier than you ever were before, and through your continued obedience, you can enjoy that state forever. I love the gospel. And economics.

(Note: If anyone who actually understands the model I alluded to reads this and is appalled by my oversimplification and likely errors, please try to take account for the knowledge atrophy that has taken place over the last 10 months in terms of anything I ever learned in school. There will be plenty time to relearn things later.)

(Another sidenote: In a previous email, I referred to the phrase "xing ku." My recent studies in Chinese characters have brought to my attention that the correct pinyin is actually "xin ku.")